2011: So Far So Good
I am happy to report that given the general thematics of 2010, the first 15 days of 2011 are looking exponentially better, which is NOT to say that every silver lining doesn't come with a bit of its own cloud.
Silver lining: in the summer I will be traveling to a particularly intriguing city that straddles Asia and Europe to write feature articles about young women and faith.
Cloud: according to Fodor's guidebook, men from this particularly intriguing city tend to assume --I kid you not--that all youngish, blondish women are Russian sex workers.
Silver lining: I will be paid to go undercover at an undisclosed location as part of a sting operation to smoke out suspected employee rats.
Cloud: While I can't discuss this too much yet, I am told that truckers and math tests will be involved--neither happen to be my forte.
Silver lining: According to Vogue, long arms* are in for Spring 2011
Cloud: As is orange lipstick.
Silver lining: Any day now, both refined white flour and an AOL email address will be retro-cool.
Cloud: Ditto Milli Vanilli.
Silver lining: Officially, Girl Scout Cookie season in Northeastern Ohio is only four weeks away.
Cloud: Officially, Spring in Northeastern Ohio is four months away.
Silver lining: In about a week, I will no longer feel guilty about breaking my New Year's resolutions...
Cloud: ...if I had made any.
Silver lining: Soon, all the salespeople of the world will stop saying "Take an additional 50% off the lowest marked price" while pointing to one of the 250 blaring red signs in the store that say "Take an additional 50% off the lowest marked price."
Cloud: Soon, we fools in Northeastern OH (delirious from lack of sunlight and in a sort of defiantly hopeful gesture) will be paying full price for the new Spring arrivals, which of course we cannot wear for four more months.
Silver lining: After an inordinately long conversation about the topic over dinner last week, I have reason to believe that I am thisclose to cracking the age-old mystery as to why all males** insist on turning down the thermostat in the winter to the temperature that is just one degree below bearable.
Cloud: As suspected all along, spreadsheets and ego are both involved.
Silver lining: My guy friends are much more verbally descriptive and imaginative than I have ever given them credit for.
Cloud: I apparently look like a Russian spy who has stolen Sherlock Holmes' winter coat after having moved to London and taken residence in Paddington Station. Huh?
*'bout time. AMEN.
**and I do mean all.
***this observation would have meant very little to me if it weren't for the fact that I happened to be present at the little caucus held among FOUR of my male friends during which this verdict was declared despite my protestations. That they spent even five minutes discussing my sartorial choices instead of prowling among the hundred or so hot women in attendance at this party can only imply that these boys felt VERY strongly about my winter attire.
Saturday, January 15, 2011
Sunday, January 9, 2011
The Last Decade Part Two or What I've Learned Now That It is Over
Major lessons learned (the hard way):
God is good.
Even beyond what we can humanly understand.
Lover never ever fails you.
But people sometimes do.
Wherever you go, there you are.
So...go wherever you are.
Bloom anyways.
Minor lessons learned (also the hard way):
Using two bunny ears to tie your shoe is a perfectly respectable way to get the job done.
In private.
Addiction to Splenda is totally legit.
Go cold turkey.
Narcissists are the most under-recognized threat to society.
And the most dangerous.
There is a way to ALWAYS sit in the best seat when flying Southwest.
And when you are my husband, I will tell you what it is.
Shih tzus are contagious.
So is generosity.
Weekly pedicures are not frivolous.
What? They're not.
P90x works.
But, like most things, only if you do.
Sow to reap.
Reap and then sow some more.
Flossing and good grammar are as important as they say.
Celebrities are not.
Making an emergency landing in Atlanta due to a failed engine is not the end of the world.
But having to sleep in a Howard Johnson instead of your room at the W in the French Quarter in New Orleans due to your missed connection is. Almost.
:)
God is good.
Even beyond what we can humanly understand.
Lover never ever fails you.
But people sometimes do.
Wherever you go, there you are.
So...go wherever you are.
Bloom anyways.
Minor lessons learned (also the hard way):
Using two bunny ears to tie your shoe is a perfectly respectable way to get the job done.
In private.
Addiction to Splenda is totally legit.
Go cold turkey.
Narcissists are the most under-recognized threat to society.
And the most dangerous.
There is a way to ALWAYS sit in the best seat when flying Southwest.
And when you are my husband, I will tell you what it is.
Shih tzus are contagious.
So is generosity.
Weekly pedicures are not frivolous.
What? They're not.
P90x works.
But, like most things, only if you do.
Sow to reap.
Reap and then sow some more.
Flossing and good grammar are as important as they say.
Celebrities are not.
Making an emergency landing in Atlanta due to a failed engine is not the end of the world.
But having to sleep in a Howard Johnson instead of your room at the W in the French Quarter in New Orleans due to your missed connection is. Almost.
:)
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